there is a simple concept that a dog knows. i know this because my dog knows it.
a dog loves when you scratch her with both of your hands. a dog will sometimes enjoy if you scratch her with just one hand depending on her mood, but she loves it exponentially more when you scratch her with two hands.
when a person is present spending time with you it is nice. but when there are no distractions in the form of phones and iphones or other people, that is even nicer. its a simple concept really.
when i get up in the morning i make a coffee. i sit on the love seat and usually gertie drags herself out of her bed to greet me and get scratches. i coax her onto the love seat and give her good scratches with two hands. i can see in her squished face and by her body language that there is nowhere in the entire universe she would rather be than right here with my two hands scratching her. she loves me.
inevitably at some point i begin to check my phone with one hand or try to maneuver my laptop with one hand and gertie scratches become reduced by 50% because i am only using one hand. gertie notices immediately and glares at my devices, lowers herself onto the the floor and sulks back to her bed.
i immediately tell her i am sorry for not giving her my full attention and beg her to come back and offer her treats but she is all set. i promise i wont use my phone anymore but she doesnt care. she curls up in her dog bed and gives me a “youre lame” sideways look with her giant eyeballs.
a dog instinctively knows when a person is not present. or does not love them actively at the moment. the dogs favorite thing is to be adored and loved whole-heartedly with two hands even if only for a short time. i believe the dog chooses none of the attention if it isnt a heart-to-heart namaste connection. my soul reaching out with two hands to acknowledge and love the soul of the dog with no distractions, even if dogs do or do not have souls.
sometimes the dog is very tired, sometimes tired of wanting your attention, to the point of sleeping on your lap and that is a time when i believe she is ok to have one hand. she accepts one hand because she is drifting into sleep and it feels nice and she also doesnt have to be fully awake and present and thats ok.
i also think the dog is accommodating and understanding when you cannot scratch her with both hands because you physically cannot, perhaps you are carrying something heavy with one hand or holding a door or i dont know, something like that. she seems to know you cannot use two hands and receives your affections wholeheartedly as if you were scratching with two hands on dog. she still loves you. she is still loyal.
this entry is about being present + fully invested and not just pretending to be present + fully invested.